Facebook

I am finally ready to admit that Facebook is messing with my head. I have a sort of ongoing love/hate/angst relationship with this giant of social media. It’s fun to keep up with mundane details from the lives of my friends across the country. I don’t like how much time I spend on it, though; I would hate to see a true accounting of how many hours I have actually spent reading comments from people I don’t know, or looking at photos from events I didn’t go to. And I’ll confess to a fair amount of angst about who I should “friend.” Church members? Professional connections? People I haven’t spoken to since sixth grade?

But here’s the thing that’s really driving me crazy: I have started thinking in third-person. I’ve started composing status updates in my head, all day long. These are updates which I have no intention of actually posting, which simply narrate whatever I’m doing or watching or thinking about. Sometimes I even edit to make them snappier, or grammatically correct.

For example, here are some updates I “wrote” in my head today:

… really needs to focus, but is instead reading about Krystal Ball, and wondering if that’s really her name.
… is going excited to see some good friends in Chicago, but wishes her sister was going to be there too.
… watches her daughter doing a little dance and hopes she can hold it until the swim lesson is over.
… has to get up very early tomorrow and should really stop blogging and go to bed.

Is this happening to anybody else, or am I losing my marbles?



  • You are not alone. For as long as I can remember, my sister wrote without pronouns. “going to shop for blah-blah.” “broke leg and in a cast.” Ask her! Sometimes it was a challenge to figure out who was shopping and who had a broken leg.

    I find I’m somewhat compulsive about Facebook. I don’t write updates but I feel the need to check to see what’s happening. I think, “Oh, I’ll write that person later” and then forget. I have an internal monologue with commentary and analysis but maybe that’s part of being an English major and introvert. I’ve even started a book or song in my head and think I’ll write it down later but that doesn’t happen either!

  • Matt and I LOOOOVE not being on facebook. Its an awesome conversation piece…

    other people: “You guys aren’t on facebook?!”
    us: “Nope.”
    other people: “Wow, you must have so much free time!”
    us: “Yep.”
    other people: “You would actually like it though, you get to stay in touch with people”
    us: “No thanks. We stay in touch just fine.”

    Plus, when Matt was at a wedding last weekend and he found out from a friend he hadn’t seen in a long time that the friend and his wife were expecting a baby, it was extra fun to have that conversation in person. We didn’t have to check their “page” to find out this news.


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